The Monroe Legacy - G.2. Chapter 20 - A Burden Shared

The next morning was a quiet one. The children seemed to sense a new and fragile peace in their parents and were surprisingly well behaved. Once Hallie had given the triplets and Gray breakfast and Cai had helped Violet get her science project started, they retreated to the studio where Cai settled in the armchair watching Hallie as she paced with a scruffy notebook clutched to her chest.

Every few passes she stopped, looked at it and looked like she was about to speak before losing her nerve. After a few minutes of this impasse Cai lost patience.

'Hallie what can't you tell me! Just say it already before we both die of old age!'

Hallie gave him a tense smile before answering,

'I think the easiest thing is for you to read it yourself,' she extended the book, holding on a little to tightly as he took it. 'This is the legacy journal my mother gave me when I turned 21. It's ... Well it's everything you need to know except what I'll explain afterwards.' 

He nodded.

As Cai read Hallie tried to occupy herself, she mixed up some paint, picked up her chisel, wandered about looking for laundry, anything to distract herself from what Cai was discovering. When the doorbell rang announcing Lola's arrival Hallie was glad to see her. She would help to explain to Cai and she could tell them both about the blackmail at once. 

As she hugged her sister hello, Cai appeared from the studio.

'What the hell Hallie?!' He exclaimed, barely acknowledging Lola's presence, 'all these months of you shutting me out are because your mum may or may not have been related to a Hollywood actress and you didn't want to tell me?'

Confusion flitted across Lola's face, 'there no maybe about it-' she began but Hallie cut her off.

'Those pages are missing,' she explained before turning to Cai and indicating the lounge area, 'please sit down and I'll tell you both everything.'

She began by outlining the missing pages, Lola chipping in every now and then to elaborate or correct the story. Cai's face was unreadable.

When Hallie was done he sighed, 'But I still don't understand why you didn't tell me and then got so weird about me not knowing. It makes no sense!'

Lola shrugged in agreement, 'Jeff doesn't know but it's never been an issue. It's all in the past right?'

Hallie shook her head. 'Somebody knows'.

'When we were first together it all happened so quickly Cai. One day we're friends and the next we were having a baby. There wasn't the right moment and as time passed I realised that you not knowing didn't change anything between us. There was also the benefit that if anyone caught wind of a connection you would honestly be able to say you had no idea and dismiss the suspicion. I saw, along with Lola and Belle, what happened when people found out the truth last time and I didn't want that for us.'

Lola shuddered.

'Once we became public figures maintaining the secret  became even more important, people are watching more closely and it had been so long that not telling seemed to have been the right thing to do. You had enough to worry about.'

Cai shrugged, 'Then what changed?'

Hallie took a deep breath. 

'The diary was stolen. That night when someone came into the house they found it. It was like they knew it existed and once they had it they gave me an ultimatum. Either I pay them or they'd release the truth to the press. That book had everything, every dirty little secret, every intimate dream of Mom's life and ours Cai, scans of the babies, letters we wrote while you were in New York, I couldn't bear to see them sold for everyone to talk about.

That was just before we found out about the triplets. I decided to wait and see what whoever had the book wanted, you were stressed, I thought you might be upset that you hadn't known all along and I just wanted it to go away.

When the call came I payed the money, that's what I was doing the night I went into labour. It seems so stupid now, putting myself at risk but I was so sure I was protecting you all just like Mom would have done.'

Sensing Hallie's struggle Lola moved closer and took her sister's hand.

'The journal was returned a few months ago but missing the crucial pages. I was so relieved to have the personal bits back and so exhausted from the children that I convinced myself it would be okay. That they only wanted what I'd given and a souvenir.

Bu they'll be back. They want more and I didn't know how to tell you Cai. Between being so busy and the stress of triplets and the books and travel I just didn't want to be another burden. I wanted to make the home side work so you'd want to be here with us, so we could be like we've always been. But I can't do it on my own any more.'

By this point Hallie was on the floor, tears trickling down her cheeks as she implored Cai with her eyes to believe that she meant no harm.

Cai was still shocked, angry at the secrecy but angrier at whoever had dared to threaten his family. Tossing the book on the coffee table he crossed and scooped Hallie up.

'You're an idiot sometimes' he said, and she nodded blearily, 'but I love you anyway. You have to trust me if this is going to keep working though. I'd rather come home to a chaotic house where I know what all the messes are than to a pretend perfect family which hides all the ugly bits.'

He smoothed his thumb across his wife's cheek, drying the last of her tears and kissed her forehead.

As Hallie felt the weight of her worry begin to lift she remembered Lola was still there. She looked for her and saw her clutching the handwritten note that had been in the journal, her face white

'Lola what's wrong' Hallie demanded, breaking away from Cai and heading to her sister's side.  'Are you okay'.

Lola looked up, her eyes wide and horrified

'I'm fine' she said, 'but I know this handwriting. He wrote to me every week for years.

This note is from Carson.'

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Read on in Chapter Twenty-One - Ugly Love